Is your child having trouble at school? Tips to handle it

Are you suddenly being bombarded with calls from your child’s school about your child’s performance or his behavioural problems? Don’t be defensive. Your child’s well-being should always be your first priority.

Remember that it’s not about you but only about an issue concerning your child. It’s not uncommon for children to, for instance, act aggressive; be distracted; or lag behind in academics sometimes. Just relax. The following tips will guide you how to handle the child and the situation.

Try and put personal feelings aside. Focus on your child:

Remember that teachers have hundreds of students to focus on whereas you can afford to dedicate more time and energy for your child. Don’t blame the school. Instead, understand the issue your child has and cooperate with the teachers. Be realistic about your child —both his behaviour and his needs.

Aggression is common for primary school children and adolescents. So, stay calm and realize that being beaten up or screamed at can be traumatic for another child too.

Partner with the teachers and school management  

If you are having a hard time with your child’s teacher then find somebody else who you can create that relationship with. Figure out if there is anyone else in the school who you can work with. It could be the school’s counsellor.

Help him through his homework assignments

Your child needs support to know that nobody is going to blame him for his poor performance. He will only be helped.

Says a parent Sarika Mohan, “We attended an evaluation meeting for him where testing was recommended. He had some tests done and it was discovered that he had a mild learning disability. As a result, the teachers arranged for some accommodations so he could learn lessons differently. From then on, we sat down with him to help him out with his homework regularly. Therefore, the school took extra responsibility to assist him. More importantly, our son was gradually becoming responsible for his learning.”

When your child complains about school, don’t join with him in criticizing his teacher. By being in that teacher’s classroom, your child is learning an important lesson.

Don’t badmouth the teacher along with your child. There’s the potential that you could make the situation much worse by doing so. Remember, when you are called you are only going to hear the story from the teacher’s viewpoint and then, from your child’s perspective. If he doesn’t like the teacher and you fuel that dislike, it’s only going to make it worse for your child who is in that classroom so many hours every day. Again, the most important thing is to try to join with the teacher if possible so that your child becomes responsible and can’t deflect that responsibility to a “bad” or a “mean” teacher.

At the same time, don’t make your child feel guilty. Just make him feel responsible for his behaviour and if it’s a case of learning disability in an older child, encourage him to accept his problem before he and everyone else involved starts working on him.

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