Bringing up boys in a world of unrest

Incidents of violence by young men are rampant across the world. Thankfully, in India, we don’t license guns as easily as elsewhere in the world so there are no instances of school shootings. Nevertheless, violence among young boys in Indian schools and colleges is not something we can ignore.

Movies, video games, and TV series present a much distorted notion of manhood. If you are a parent, then there is something tangible you can do in your own capacity to deal with the problem.

1. Don’t put up with someone shaming your son for being gentle. Society also has a very absurd idea of manhood or boyhood. It is important to make a point and convey that it is manly to be calm, composed, strong, and compassionate as opposed to being angry, intolerant, and violent. So, make your point with those who smirk at your child for being gentle and also, reinforce a sane idea of what it means to be a strong man in your boy’s mind.
2. Urge him to play nonviolent games.  Let him hang out with friends who enjoy less-violent games. If you child has a lot of physical energy, then encourage him to take up martial arts where there are rules of combat.
3. Teach him to be gentle with animals. It is a proven fact that men who are conditioned to being violent right from their childhood often treat animals badly. It is also a known fact that those who mistreat animals are more prone to committing physical and sexual crimes.
4. Expose your son to arts. This will nurture the feminine in him. In every human being, there is a yin (feminine) and masculine (yang). If his feminine side remains dormant, then it will lead to frustration in his adulthood. Think of all the men who are scared to have a good cry to vent their emotions.
5. Let him volunteer to help animals and the environment. Planting sapling, feeding poor kids, and caring for street animals will help him be a good man and a good human being. Take him to an animal shelter and/or an orphanage. Let him spend time with inmates there.

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